(image courtesy of http://www.yourbabylibrary.com)
So excitement is slowly shifting to nerves now. It doesn’t just feel like regular excitable nerves either, I feel pretty terrified. I read this weeks Emma’s Diary, that said Charlie is now pretty much ready to come out. He has everything he needs and the last few weeks are just to gain some weight before he comes. Plus, my pregnant friend Laura is being induced tomorrow! She was always having her baby in October like me, due 2 weeks before me. Now she’s having her daughter! She’s had to have her early because some of her late scans have shown that the baby isn’t grown as she should be, so they think it’s safer to bring her a couple weeks early. Hopefully everything will be fine with them both. It’s just made me realise how close it is and how real it is.
I was talking to Paul about it too, he tried to reassure me that it’s not just me that doesn’t feel ready, he doesn’t either. He seems more worried about what things will be like when Charlie’s here. It’s a shame that there’s such a distance between us, that’s the only real issue. We’ve agreed that I’ll be driving to his every weekend and staying over with Charlie, and that Paul will just pay for the petrol and the weekend, rather than actually pay me maintenance for Charlie. He will be struggling a lot with money I think. People keep saying to me “well that’s his problem” and that I should still make him give me money. I think spending time with his son is more important though. If he paid maintenance he probably wouldn’t be able to afford the weekends…and I’m sure Charlie would rather spend time with his dad than know his dad gave me money for stuff. I guess we’ll just see.
On a lighter note, I met up with an old college friend, Amy, this week, which has been really nice. We haven’t seen each other for years, but we still text and talk on Facebook quite a lot, and seeing each other just made it all go back to how it was before, so not at all awkward. We went out for lunch one day and went the cinema a couple days later. She used to live quite far away but she’s recently moved to my town to live with her boyfriend, so it’s hide that we can catch up. When I first saw her she couldn’t stop staring at my bump, which made me laugh.
Speaking of my bump, life is becoming more and more uncomfortable! Don’t get me wrong, I love feeling Charlie moving around and letting me know he’s fine, but when he stretches out into my ribs and my bladder at the same time…it gets a bit tricky. Sometimes I sit there thinking “please just go to sleep!”, I suppose it will just prepare me for when he’s here! Haha.
I’m off to a party tonight, my mums friends 40th. I won’t know many people but it should still be a nice night with my family, especially since I haven’t been out much recently! Then I’m having the second Birth Plan meeting with my midwife on Tuesday as well as my second Antenatal Class on Tuesday evening! Fun times.